


this is me trying

by ohjustpeachy



Series: Tony Stark Bingo Fills [14]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Getting Together, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mutual Pining, Protective Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-09
Updated: 2020-08-09
Packaged: 2021-03-06 02:29:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,206
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25805902
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohjustpeachy/pseuds/ohjustpeachy
Summary: Steve visited Tony in the hospital three times before he finally woke up.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Series: Tony Stark Bingo Fills [14]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1601260
Comments: 12
Kudos: 203
Collections: Tony Stark Flash Bingo





	this is me trying

**Author's Note:**

> for my tony stark flash bingo square: cheeseburgers

Steve visited Tony in the hospital three times before he finally woke up. **  
**

Natasha had urged him, that first night, to go home, to shower, put something in his stomach, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. Putting one foot in front of the other, carrying himself back to the Tower and, what? Making himself a sandwich like everything was okay? Steve couldn’t do that. 

So instead he sat by Tony’s bed, looking at the tubes hooked up to him and listening to the constant, steady beeps of the machines all around him, straining to hear what the nurses were saying outside his room. _Are you family?_ One of them asked kindly, sometime around three in the morning. Steve was groggy, half-asleep and worried out of his mind and he nodded, at first, then shook his head. _Just a friend._ She laid a hand on Steve’s shoulder then and part of him wanted to weep at the touch, the way she pressed gently and said, with confidence, _You’re a good friend. I’m sure he’ll be glad to see you when he wakes up._

Steve clung onto it. _When_ , she’d said. Not _if_.

*

The second day, with Natasha’s help, Steve did manage to get himself home. He showered for a long time, standing under the scalding spray until he felt raw, until the water ran cold over his shoulders and left him shivering. 

When he got back to the hospital, Rhodey was there, and Thor and Natasha, again. Steve nodded at Rhodey, then folded himself in between Thor and Nat, didn’t pull away when Nat leaned in for a quick, one-armed hug. It wasn’t much, but it was something, enough for both of them. The monitors continued to beep. Continued to keep Tony alive while they waited and watched and worried.

_It wasn’t your fault, you know that right?_

A heavy sigh. A long pause, then a nod. _I know._

Steve didn’t know that, though. She’s smart enough to realize he was lying through his teeth, but she didn’t press him. 

_It wasn’t. Come on, let’s go get some coffee._

The walk to the hospital cafe was quiet, just the sounds of their shoes on the linoleum and the bright, humming fluorescent lights to guide them. Steve sipped at his putrid coffee. Tony would hate this, he knew; bad coffee was one of his many pet peeves. He was still lost in thought when Nat broke the silence. 

_When he wakes up, you have to tell him._

Another nod. Steve didn’t trust his voice. 

*

Tony looked so small laying in that hospital bed. That’s the thought that Steve kept coming back to. The Tony Stark in front of him was so at odds with the Tony Stark he’d come to know and—

No. A deep, shuddering breath. 

He looked better today, that’s what the nurses said, anyway. It could be any time now that he woke up. The nurse from the first night was back again. 

_This is the worst part, isn’t it? The waiting game._

_Yeah. I—. Yeah._

_You’re a good friend._

Again she placed a hand on his shoulder. He thought of his mother, a nurse, too. Had she been this way with her patients? Knowing exactly what they need and when? Steve was sure she was. She’d had all that practice with him, after all. 

Steve gave his best approximation of a smile. _Thank you._

But _was_ he a good friend? Tony was here because he took a hit meant for Steve. Steve, for his part, hadn’t moved quickly enough, was in fact, just seconds away when Tony went down, and now here they were. In a hospital, unsure when Tony would wake up. _If_ he would wake up, Steve’s traitorous brain supplied. And, that’s not to mention the fact that Steve had been lying to Tony every day for the better part of a year now. Letting him think they really were just friends, that Steve wasn’t harboring feelings that were threatening to drown him. 

But he would fix it. All of it. _When_ Tony woke up. 

Steve’s jaw felt tense enough to shatter. 

*

Steve isn’t sure what makes him do it, but on the fourth day, he stops at Five Guys on his way to the hospital. He orders two cheeseburgers and nods, satisfied, as he makes his way to the hospital.

The nurse runs to Steve when he arrives, face lit up in a smile as she tells him, breathlessly: “Your friend is awake!”

It’s all Steve can do not to run to the room. 

Tony still looks small. He’s still hooked up to far too many tubes, and the monitors continue their beeping, but Tony gives Steve a weak smirk as he enters the room, and Steve feels like his knees might give out beneath him. 

He’s awake. He’s breathing and smiling at him and it might be a long road to recovery but he really will be okay. 

“Hey, Cap,” Tony says, his voice raspy with disuse. 

“Hi,” Steve says, and the word feels so small in the room between them. He lifts the bag to have something to say. “I brought you this.”

Tony’s smile widens. “Burgers? Steven, you truly are an American hero.” 

Steve sets the bag down on the bedside table, then continues to stand there quietly, at war with himself. Surely he can’t just blurt out his feelings right here?

“So,” Tony says. “A little bird tells me _someone_ wouldn’t leave my side this whole time. I’ve been out for almost five whole days now.”

_Oh._

“Oh, uh, I mean, we’ve all been—” Steve sucks in a breath. Tony looks at him. “You scared me,” Steve says instead, meeting Tony’s eye.

“I’m sorry about that,” Tony says quietly. 

Steve sits, perching in the same chair he’s spent so many hours in, dragging it as close to Tony’s bed as he can. “Don’t be. _I’m_ sorry.”

“Don’t do that. It wasn’t your fault. How many times has our favorite Russian spy tried to tell you that since I’ve been out?”

Steve can’t help the laugh that escapes him. “A few,” he admits. 

They’re quiet for another minute, Tony watching him, like he’s trying to decide something. He reaches over, taking Steve’s hand in his own. It’s warm and rough against Steve’s palm, and his heart lurches. Tony meets his eye, waiting, maybe, for Steve to pull back, give him a sign that this is wrong, all wrong. That he’d been waiting here in this room for so many days because he’s just _a good friend._

Steve doesn’t. 

Finally, Tony smiles again. “One of these is for you, right?” He looks at the burgers. 

“Sure, if you don’t mind sharing,” Steve says. 

“I’ve been known to make an exception here and there,” Tony says. 

Steve ducks his head, then nods. He’d eat it one-handed, then, because he has no intention of letting Tony go. Not yet. Hopefully not ever. 

They have a lot to talk about, he knows that. Tony has a long road to go before things are back to normal. But for now: cheeseburgers. And Tony’s hand in his, and the gentle beeping, reminding Steve again and again that Tony is _alive, alive, alive._

**Author's Note:**

> i'm omg-just-peachy on tumblr, come say hi!


End file.
